cry it out and sleep through the night (with updates)

i read bringing up bebe by pamela druckerman during my pregnancy and was so determined to try cry it out method. but the determination was drown away because yos and i are some kind of soft-hearted, especially we are first time parents. seeing iola was so small and her crying sound was heartbreaking, we were back out. so, i continued nursing her to sleep every single day and night.

quite a few times i got tips from fellow mommies on how to train the baby to sleep by themselves, which is include the cry it out method. it only took a few days to let them learn on how to soothe themselves, since babies are trainable and they are actually able to soothe themselves since young age. but, once again, i tried and then i gave up. unable to bear the heartbreaking moment on seeing my lovely baby cries for such a long time.

few days ago, yos broke out a news that his colleague's son - only a few days older than iola - is already sleep by himself since months ago. and i asked, how? by letting him cry till he is tired and then fall asleep by himself. that method again! i got tickled! in my head i heard a voice, "hey! come on! they can do it, so can you!"  yos and i were looking at each other, then we looked at iola. i asked him, "do you want to try it on her, tonight?"

day 1
i nursed her at night and she showed the sign that she was already sleepy. but she kept unlatching, then sent me a playful laugh, then latch again, and unlatch again, and it kept going endlessly. so, i put her on the bed while i was laying beside her, tired of course, she flipped to her tummy, crawled backward, shook her butt, and all the playful acts she could do. after we decided that she had enough of play, we brought her to her crib, put the blanket on her, kissed her forehead, said goodnight, and left her alone in the room.

few minutes in the beginning, she didn't realize what was going on. but after she knew that nobody in the room to accompany her, she screamed and cried. we peeked from the door gap, watched her cry uncontrollably  like she never before. it was a solid 45 minutes, till she finally fell asleep in her cry.

she was on her tummy, so we need to flip her to her back. when we flipped her, she was awaken by my whisper to yos and then started crying again. so, i nursed her for a few minutes so that she can go back to sleep.

day 2
nursed her at night till she fell asleep. put her in the crib, but then she opened her eyes. we put her blanket on, and left her alone. she flipped on her tummy, cried for 10 minutes, then fell asleep.

when we tried to flip her to her back, she was awake again. started crying so hard, we tried to pat her, sang her a songs, and held her hands, it was successful to calm her down. but then, yos left the room and she cried again. so, i nursed her again for a few minutes only to put her to sleep.

that night, she lightly awake for a few times. sounds like she was crying for a second or two, but then fell asleep again by her own. she was only awake once, demanding for milk, at about 3 or 4AM (didn't see the clock).

day 3
after nursing her, she was still awake and laughing, asking for more time to play. but, i know she was already sleepy. we straight away put her to sleep, and left her alone. she cried for 15 minutes before finally falling asleep on her own. when we tried to flip her to her back, she didn't awake! voila! it almost works!

she slept for a solid 7 hours that night, which falls into "sleep through the night"! horray! good job, darling.. and congrats for being such a smart little girl..

so, yeah, finally we got our chance hardening our hearts and taught our girl to sleep on her own. we are no experts, we are just trying a method which has been done for thousand times by thousands other parents. we don't encourage to do "cry it out" and then leave your baby in the room without being supervised. please be noted that we stood for that whole 45 minutes in front of the door, only to peek from the gap on how iola did. we didn't dare to leave iola crying alone for more than a minute.

good job, partner! ;)
and good luck for other fellow parents!


for those who read this previously, here i am updating the progress of her sleep training - which is not as we were expected.

day 4
she only moaned twice, and then fell asleep by herself.
BUT, the whole night she kept waking up every one or two hours. i was so stressful because of her newborn habit seemed coming back once again.

the morning after was terrible.

day 5
we tried again. we put her in the box once she looked sleepy, then we left her in the room. but unlike the night before, she couldn't fall asleep on her own, instead she cried so bad for an hour. i looked at her weeping face, and decided that enough is enough. one hour crying is too much for a 6 months old baby, all she needed was being carried by her mother. so i lifted her up and nursed her for a while before she fell asleep (it's only 5 mins top, she was already sleepy but she wanted to be nursed to sleep as usual.. oh, my poor baby girl).

day 6
back to our usual habit - nurse to sleep! and it was our best decision ever!

lesson learned:
we think that by leaving iola cry it out for several days has made her traumatized with her cot. we learned that every time we put her in the cot, she started crying unreasonably - even in daytime. she was stressed, and we didn't want it to be her fear.. because it was not the goal. we summarized that no babies are the same, and even thousands of parents has successful with this method, we might be not one of them. and if nurse to sleep is the best way that makes my baby happy, then be it.

again, good luck parents! ;)


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